As you all know I am in anesthesia school and am more than halfway done!! I will graduate in December of 2011. It has been an extremely hard and intense program for me along with the emotions of not being around my family as much. I have known all along that I would have to come to El Paso, TX for four months to do a rotation and have dreaded it for months.
Two weeks ago the time came to say goodbye to my little girls and head on this journey. It was the hardest day of my life. I held back the tears as I kissed my girls goodbye and left them at my mom's as Mike and I drove away. Once in the car where they couldn't see I let the river of tears run almost the whole way to Las Vegas where we stopped for the night.
Luck was with us when we went to dinner at the hotel and sat down at a slot machine and together won $300 plus dollars at the slot machine with only a couple pushes of the button! We got up the next morning and headed towards Phoenix, AZ where we were going to spend the night. When we got there it was only like 4:00 so we decided we would go ahead and keep driving. Let me tell you, by the time we got to El Paso around midnight I was completely tired of the car! We got into my apartment and realized that we needed some toilet paper and headed to Wal-Mart. We finally made it to bed around 2:30 and got some well deserved rest!. The next day was New Year's eve. We got up and went to Target to get a few things for my apt and then came back and went out with some of my classmates for a little New Year's eve fun! On New Years day I took Mike to the airport and have been lonely ever since.
It is so hard knowing that I made this decision to go back to school and that I have to be away from them because I chose to. I know everyone tells me that the time will fly and that I will miss them more than they miss me, but I still feel like a horrible mom for leaving them.
During the first week and a half here I cried every night after I talked to them on Skype, and I tear up every time I receive a picture message of them. It is getting a little easier now as I know I get to go home for a few days next week! I just hope and pray that my family will benefit from this sacrifice that we are all making for me to continue my education. I pray that it will teach my children that education is very important and that they will strive to do the best in school that they can.
This is the hardest thing I have ever done, but it has also made me come to realize and appreciate my husband for everything he is and isn't. He is the best dad my girls could ask for, I realize that every time I see him kissing and hugging them or joking with them to cheer them up. He is the best husband that I could ask for. Not many men would agree to let their wife go back to school well knowing they were going to have to do more than their 100% of duties at home and work. There is no way I could have done this without him. I am thankful that he is not jealous, and that he encourages me to go out to dinner with friends and co-workers so that I am not alone and depressed here. So, thank you Mike for all you have done for our family! XOXO
Here are some pictures of my home away from home in El Paso
The clubhouse is pretty nice, and I can't wait for it to warm up so I can hit the pool! 
3 comments:
You are awesome! Seriously.
Your apartment is great and I'm SO glad you get to come home every few weeks.
Everything you said is right and true and you'll be better for the experience.
LOVE YOU!
Aww, you're making me want to drive over to your house and give your girls a hug for you! You are very strong and will get through it! You have come so far already, I remember how hard it was at first and look at where you are now. Woot! I can't believe you onle have 12 more months!
You are on the downhill run! It'll be over soon enough! I don't know how you are doing it, you are seriously awesome!
Post a Comment